One of the darkest periods of my life was when we adopted my younger son and he cried and screamed relentlessly wanting nothing to do with me for six months and then continuing to cry a little less each day until it stopped 3.5 years later. It brought out the worst in me – angry, afraid and feeling desperately out of control. If I were to give my old self advice on how to get through it I would tell myself the following below. In today’s time of uncertainty, I have to keep these things in the forefront of my mind and remind myself again and again. I hope this helps you in some little way too.
1. We have no idea what is going to happen and for how long and while there is sort of a target date of when things might start getting back to normal, let go of any expectations of what will happen and when. Expectations keep us in an unknown future creating more anxiety.
2. You might feel fear or panic or want to be silly and have fun. All those feelings are valid and the more you give yourself space to feel, the easier it is to acknowledge them which is the key to letting go. Don’t judge yourself and it will be easier not to judge others. Believe, as you do for yourself, that everyone is doing the best they can with what they know.
3. You can’t control what’s going to happen tomorrow. There is only today. As soon as I start thinking about how we will get through next month or the month after, my mind spirals down to the worst cast scenarios. “One day at a time” is an old adage but very true.
4. Thinking about the economy and how my business will survive, my husband’s job and my kids missing 6-weeks+ of instruction racks me with worry but the thing I am finding comfort in is that we are not alone. Covid-19 is impacting the entire world and no one is immune. When we stop to think how we are not alone, it is incredibly comforting and it helps us recognize that we can only get through this together. Be mindful and considerate of others.
5. Trusting yourself isn’t about believing that everything around you will turn out fine. It’s believing that no matter how hard things may get, you will get through it.
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