I recently attended a woman’s circle held by my friend Manjeet of Infinite Life Balance on Goddesses. While I wouldn’t consider myself overly spiritual or into Goddesses, I am open to and enjoy all experiences and believe that we should use whatever means we need to to help us along on our journeys.
During our discussion on Hindu Goddesses, one of the participants shared about Akhilandeshwari, the Goddess she feels connected to most right now. She is the Goddess of transition, “never not broken” and as soon as I learned of her, she resonated deeply and I knew she was the Goddess for me.
I don’t believe any of us are broken. I believe we are already and always will be whole. However, feeling broken is something that we all grapple with throughout our lives. At one point early on in my journey, after I had my awakening, I believed I would live in a perpetual state of Zen and inner peace. While there is a deep inner peace in me, I still grapple with challenging emotions and experiences regularly and just when I get to one resolution, another challenge begins.
I have come to realize that this journey is a perpetual process of peeling away those layers, healing ever deeper levels of trauma, and that there is no real ending or completeness, or a destination at which we will eventually arrive.
The feeling of brokenness doesn’t have to be something we struggle against. We can embrace it fully because it means we are constantly being broken open, into pieces we can reassemble again and again as we gain wisdom through our life experiences. Pain, growth and transformation are all part of the process of being human and of being alive.
Akhilandeshwari is unafraid of breaking herself again and again because she is like a prism, breaking into shards of glass, each reflecting light, shining more brightly than she would as a single piece. She uses breaking as a tool for transformation. So what if we were to see breaking like she does? And instead of struggling and running away from feeling this way, we learn to run to it, knowing that we will reassemble ourselves again and our light will ever shine more brightly?
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